The end of my roaring 20s

And just like that, the sun is setting on my roaring twenties. The main reason I've always loved writing about my life in some capacity, from diaries to journals to my blog, is because having a documented log of your life and of yourself is really beautiful. It means you can easily go back and revisit who you were at various points. Sometimes just to say hello to the old you, sometimes to see how far you've come, and sometimes to see just how yourself you've always been.

I've always used this blog to document the big things and I feel quite thankful that I've been keeping it for so long now. Because not only does it mean that I get to document the end of my twenties, but it also means I have a document of the start of them. 

Back in 2016, I wrote a blog post, welcome to the roaring 20s, where I talked about all the things I hoped that the next decade would bring me. Now that we've reached the end of that decade, I thought it'd be nice to see what I managed, what I didn't and what I learnt along the way.

1. Learn to drive

"This is priority number 1 for me considering it was my new years resolution and we're now 6 months in and I've made no progress. I've passed my theory already but considering that took me 3 attempts and my mum didn't pass her driving test until the 4th attempt, I don't hold out much hope that I'll be a great driver. Pray for me."

Verdict:

Ye of little faith; I passed first time. And if I do say so myself, I'm an excellent driver. It depends who you ask, as Ash and my family accuse me of being a boy racer, but it's hard not to be atleast a little bit when you have a little bit of a boy racer car. After passing my test, I got my adorable little red Peugeot 107 and then 4 years later, I traded it in for my dream car.

2. Move out

"I'm definitely in no rush to move out (especially since I'll have to get a place with a separate room just for my clothes and shoes) but in a year or so maybe. I love living at home but I think it's about time to be a full-time adult."

Verdict:

The time to be a full-time adult came just after my 23rd birthday, when I completed on my first house! I (*cough cough* mum and dad) spent a few months doing it up and then sold it again only a year later to move in with my ex. Then 3 years later, we split up and I moved again when I bought my house now. So I actually ended up moving around a bit more than anticipated in my twenties but I saved the best for last. My house is such a happy place for me and I'm still so obsessed 2 years later with how I (*cough cough* mum and dad again) decorated it. Plus, I'm going into my thirties with the most amazing roommate ever since Ash moved in 5 months ago! Oh, and most importantly, I have had a separate room for all my clothes and shoes at each and every one of my addresses in my twenties. That was non-negotiable.

3. Build a career

"I always knew I never wanted to go to uni (I decided that when I was about 13 and someone came in and did a talk at school) but despite that, I feel like I've already put down some pretty good career foundations so far. Now it's just time to actually secure that dream job. Or as close to it as possible."

Verdict:

A career, I've definitely built. I started my twenties with a part-time marketing and social media assistant job, which I did on the side of shifts at McDonalds. Fast forward 10 years, and I've just been promoted to Product Marketing Lead with a salary more than triple what I was on when I was 20. I've worked in law, ecommerce, pharmaceuticals, construction, and software, and I've remained relentless in my pursuit for career progression. An important lesson I've gained though is that there is no "dream job"; the dream is in the journey and in working a job that allows you to live your best life, outside of work.

4. Move to London

"Realistically I know that to get my dream job in writing/journalism, I'll have to move to London because there just aren't the jobs here. And although it's scary and will cost a bomb, I can't imagine anything better than being a twenty-something living in London."

Verdict:

So it turns out I can imagine something better than being a twenty-something living in London; financial security. I love London. Always have, always will. But it turns out that spending the last decade regularly visiting London with the spare money I have from not living there is the best of both worlds. I imagined for a long time that I'd move to London at some point, but the more established my career became, and the more I put down roots with houses and relationships and friendships, the less I was able to imagine myself going. I can't see myself ever moving there now, but I could see myself working a job that required commuting there every week or so, and I tend to go atleast a few times a year anyway so I get my fix of fun, theatre, and rooftop bars.

5. Do something every day that scares you

"This is a quote that's stuck with me since I first read it (as a lot of others do) because I just think it's so true. And one of my biggest fears is to live a boring life; I want an extraordinary one. And they say that great things never came from comfort zones. So the main one is obviously moving to London but even things like going on a massive roller coaster or singing on karaoke in front of a crowd would work too. Remember, if it's both terrifying and amazing then you should definitely pursue it."

Verdict:

I was quite wise at 20. This is one of those examples where I enjoy re-reading because I get to see just how myself I've always been. I could've easily written that passage yesterday because I still have an immense fear of a boring life, or of not making the most of my time on this earth. While some people realise this way too late, I'm so proud that I've carried that ideology with me throughout my twenties. So I've pushed myself. I've said yes to scary things. I've plunged into the arctic sea, I've flown in a helicopter, I've jumped off boats, I've climbed walls and abseiled off bridges. And the nicest unexpected aspect of living with that attitude is the way that you grow in confidence! I thought I was a confident person at 20 but going into 30, I can see just how much those scary experiences have helped me to blossom. Actually, it's in the quieter scary things that have helped me to grow the most. Travelling all the way to Vietnam solo, pushing myself to make new friends aged 27, starting over again after my relationship broke down, speaking up at work and advocating for myself and my ideas. I've pursued all manner of terrifying and amazing things and I don't plan on stopping any time soon. Also as you can see, I did indeed make it onto massive rollercoasters and the karaoke main stage.

6. Own a Valentino

"Anyone that either knows me well or has been reading for a while, will know that Valentino is my all-time favourite designer and to own something Valentino is a life goal of mine. So when better to achieve it than in my twenties? I think I'll start with a pair of rockstud shoes."

Verdict: 

Financial lessons have been some of the biggest I've learned in my twenties because back when I was earning my measley fortnightly pay packet from McDonalds, I imagined that as soon as I got my first £600 in one go, I would take that £600 straight to Valentino and spend it on a pair of rockstud heels. When I got my first £2,000, I'd buy a Givenchy Antigona bag. When I got my first £5,000, I'd be straight back to Valentino to buy a couture dress. Obviously that didn't end up being the case. Realising that luxury is named that for a reason, and not because just anyone on a minimum wage job can afford it, was probably my first financial lesson of my twenties. So instead of excessive prices, I leaned into excess. I filled every dressing room that I moved into, with loads of iconic, timeless, and well-loved pieces that fill me with joy and excitement. They're not expensive, but it's not like anyone has ever accused me of dressing badly. Maybe it's not about the size (of your paycheck) that matters, it's how you use it.

7. Live in America

"I've always loved American culture and so I've known for a while now that I want to live there. It won't be for atleast 5 years I wouldn't think but it'll still hopefully be in my twenties so it makes it onto the list! New York is the ultimate dream for me because it's basically the fashion and writing capital of the world but I'd also love to live in a nice hot sunny state at some point."

Verdict:

It turns out I was really drinking the kool aid in my teenage years, because I now can't fathom a worse country to live in than America. New York was the ultimate dream purely based off of watching Gossip Girl and Sex and the City, and the glossy versions of girlhood/womanhood that those shows perpetuate. In my dreaming, I obviously ignored the part where all the Gossip Girl characters are supposed to be millionaires, and the financial wellbeing of all the SATC characters has been highly debunked (Carrie is writing a local newspaper column once a week and somehow able to afford a brownstone on the Upper East Side, plus endless pairs of $450 heels). I guess the ultimate dream for me was actually being rich, falling in love, and being surrounded by amazing female friends, all in a great outfit of course. Because once I look beyond that, there's nothing about America that draws me to living there. The hyper final stage capitalism, the private medical care, the insane levels of chemicals and sugar in all their food, the backwards politics, the low levels of intelligence and insane indoctrination, the regressive attitudes to womens rights... Having said all that, it hasn't stopped me from wanting to scratch the itch by visiting! I've actually been to the States a few times and loved places like New Orleans, New York, and Vegas. So no, you won't catch me living there. But you might just catch me passing through. The living abroad dream still exists, but it'd be somewhere in France or Portugal or Spain.

8. Get a tattoo

"Back to a more short-term one, this is going to be the year I finally get a tattoo. I've always been pretty neutral on tattoos - I like them but I've never been desperate to get one. However, I found one I really liked ages ago and I've wanted it ever since so after summer I'll finally be getting it!"

Verdict: 

I was right, the year I turned 20 was the year I got a tattoo. And over the last decade, I got 9 more! I'm now at 10 in total, with my lovely tatoo artist friend G having just done tattoos number 9 and 10 for me last summer. Am I done now? Let's wait and see.

9. Save money

"Okay so maybe this one kind of contradicts the other things on the list like buying a Valentino and living in London (one of the most expensive cities in the world) but up until now, all my money has just been for getting drunk and buying clothes. Obviously that will continue through my twenties (because some birds can't be caged) but it's time to start thinking about my future too and so once I have a proper job, I think it's time I start saving. For a dream house in New York maybe?"

Verdict:

20 year old me was more self-aware than I probably gave her credit for. She was right that some birds can't be caged! In all my almost-30-year-old wisdom, I still spend an awful lot of money on getting drunk and buying clothes. But why not? Prohibition never stood a chance against exhibition. Or hedonism, for that matter. And now that I have my job and my house, and my car is paid off, I'm back where I started, in believing that money is for enjoying. As is life.

10. See the world

"Obviously I've been spending too much time on pinterest lately because I'm reeling off all the cheesy quotes in this post but one that I think just rings so true is 'the world is a book and those who do not travel, read only one page'. I just can't understand why people choose to stay in one place when there's so much of the world to see, it's like you're selling yourself short in life. So if there's one quote to live by through the next decade, it'd have to be 'We should all start to live before we get too old. Fear is stupid. So are regrets.'"

Verdict:

And that, dear reader, is what I did. What a world I've already seen! I actually counted up because I have a timeline feature on my Been app and in my twenties I managed 94 trips abroad! Which would be impressive anyway but with Covid taking over a good 2 years of that as well, I think that's even more mindblowing. I've now been to 48 countries across 4 continents, and I'm showing no signs of slowing down yet. I wasn't joking when I wrote that you're selling yourself short if you don't travel. Of all the amazing things I've accomplished in my twenties, I think the me from the start of this decade would be the most impressed by this one!

The end of the roaring 20s, and the start of...

As my roaring twenties comes to a close, I think you can why I'm pretty happy with how they turned out. Out of everything I set out to do or achieve, I either managed it, or learned why it was better that I didn't. 10 years ago, I wrote that "if my twenties are even nearly as fun as my teenage years have been then I think I'm in for a pretty good time". And if it isn't broke then don't fix it right? So I will second what she wrote by saying that if my thirties are even nearly as fun as my twenties have been then I think I'm in for a pretty great time. Goodbye to the roaring twenties, and hello to being thirty, flirty and THRIVING.